Sunday, February 19, 2006

Top Ten Worst Battlestar Galactica Colonial Convoy Ship Names

Don't forget to reply to one of the previous two posts to log your BSG Worst Callsigns: when we get to 100 I'll post them as a single entry. As for the ship names, here are some of the plucky freighter ID's you'll rarely see featured in the series, but they're pluggin' along toward Earth just the same:

10. The Irreconcilable Differences
9. The Cash-Up-Front
8. The Slip of the Tongue
7. The Lallapalooza
6. The Home Cooking
5. The Maternity Ward
4. The Runner-Up
3. The Low Gas Mileage
4. The Star Wars Ripoff
3. The Local Franchise
2. The Holy Shit
1. The Shut-Up-And-Drive

So now we have this overheard wireless chatter: "Attention, Colonial Freighter Irreconcilable Differences, this is Viper Captain Nutsack. You have been ordered to rendesvous with The Maternity Ward at 0600." "Nutsack, this is Holy Shit, we have incoming dradis contacts." "Nutsack, Skidmark. Watch your six!" "I can't shake em!" BOOM. "Nutsaaaack! Nuuuuutsaaaack!" [radio cuts out].

Man, I wish I could sleep. This is a terrible misuse of the internet. END TRANSMISSION


Blogger David said...

1. Obvious: Enterprise
2. Meteorological: Mighty Wind
3. Fashionable: Smart Black Dress
4. Personal: Marx Pride
5. Punctual: The Centon Hand
6. Envious: The Sour Grapes
7. Naughty: The Blue Dress
8. Philosophical: Tree In The Woods
9. Humorous: Priest & Rabbi
10. Commercial: SciFi Channel
11. Polite: Pardon Star
12. Melodic: Adama’s Song
13. Sympathetic: Our Condolences
14. Complementary: Whoa Nice Tits
15. Scientific: Pi In The Sky
16. Obscure: Imperious Leader
17. Inquiry: Cylon What Cylon?
18. French: The Capitulate
19. Pornographic: Moisture Missle
20. Religious: The Flying Cross
21. Disgusting: Rising Bile
22. Paranoid: Who’s There
23. Aromatic: Caprican Cheese
24. Appreciative: Back Atcha
25. Dirty: Tailblazer

8:34 PM  
Blogger David said...

upon further consideration I would like to exchange By Your Command for Imperious Leader.

Writing is rewriting afterall.

5:17 PM  
Blogger Tin Foil Hat said...

I'm partial to "Slow, Unarmed, and Vulnerable." Or how about, "Toaster Bait."

4:52 AM  

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